Pause Please…

Three years ago an idea came to me. I would start a blog. Using it as a way to journal my families trips and adventures. Writing what was on my heart as I poured myself into climbing and mountaineering. I never felt a need to write all the time. There are trips I wish I had chronicled, feelings I tucked away too afraid to share, unfinished drafts…

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I started this blog because I love writing, although I have much to improve on. It’s always been a work in progress. A filtering of ideas and thoughts typed away at night. All I really wanted to do was share a part of my world and maybe connect with others along the way. And then I got another idea. At the age of 38, I would go back to school and finally earn a degree. I knew it would be hard, but honestly, I really had no idea just how much it would take out of me. Crazy early mornings, rediculously late nights, fitting it in whenever I could, and this little blog took a back burner. But with all that I survived my first year.

As time passed, and another year began, I almost forgot about this world of mine that I had started. And then one day, I decided to click the icon on my computer screen and check things out. Winter quarter was almost over, and the spring held so many promises. But we all know what happened next. 2020 said, pause please…

I suppose that would have been a good time to jump back into writing. I mean I had the time. But somehow, the time wasn’t what I needed. Like so many of those around me, everything just felt so big, and heavy. The news seemed to get worse every day. First we watched as people got sick and cases rose. Then a man died at the hand of others, and then another, and another. Writing about hiking and what to pack in a backpack just didn’t seem like the right place to pour my energy. So we built a fort in our yard, played our version of lawn frisbee golf, ate dinner around the table again. We had long conversations about what was happening, dug deep in the earth as we planted a garden, and chose to focus on loving each other fiercly.

When I look back on the last year, there will always be a tinge of sadness at the memories. There was always a low hanging cloud over most days, but I know so much growth and learning came from that time. It forced me to take a look at my values, and how I wanted to teach my kids. I learned how to finally give myself grace over circumstances I couldn’t control.

It’s been over a year since all of that happened, and things are slowly starting to get back to normal. Although it’s a new kind of normal, I’m ready take it on. As we approach the start of the school year, I’m excited for what lies ahead. I’m registred for my next college classes, our homeschool room is getting a make over and we are soaking up as much of the summer outside as we can.

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